Well I managed to roll out of bed this morning – not early at all because after waking up at 1:22, I couldn’t get back to sleep until about 6 – but I did rise from the dead eventually. There was nothing in me that felt like running 14 miles. But I really wanted to try out my new shoes and sweat out the wine. I ate some toast with peanut butter and cinnamon, drank my cup ‘o coffee, and was on my way. As recommended by one of PS2’s FB friends, I ended up buying a water bottle at Dicks sporting goods yesterday, so I took that with some Nuun. I said a little prayer that once I started running, the feelings would come, but it just wasn’t happening. I think running is like, 90% mental and 10% physical. So I busted out the mental strength and kept running. I got to 2 miles and didn’t want to turn around and do just 4, so I went for 1. More. Mile. Then turned around. The miles couldn’t go fast enough.
This is what I carried today, and I actually didn’t mind carrying it!
First of all, I was soooooooo dehydrated before I even started running. Second of all, my body has been tired and achy and on the verge of getting sick for the past few days, so between the wine festival, being dehydrated, and getting sick, even just those 6 miles was rough. (And when I was done, it was actually only 5.75) Normally, I can’t stop running until I hit an even mile, but this time I made an exception. You can do that you know. I mean, when you set your own rules, you can most certainly break them! Also, I’ve become wiser in my old age and have realized its better to listen to your body and take a break when its needed. I hate taking walk breaks too because then its hard to start back up, but today, I probably took 5 walk breaks. And I don’t even feel guilty about it – that’s progress!
Lastly, I mentioned before that I pass out a lot. Well today could have been one of those days…I have been passing out since I was in kindergarten. Every year during my school play you would hear my Dad say, “there she goes again” and rush to the stage to carry me out. You can go ahead and laugh. I can laugh about it now too – even though I still have this problem. I passed out until about the 8th grade and then I never passed out again during high school. Not until my 20’s did it start up again. One major problem though, is I would always forget to tell new people in my life, that I have this issue. I mean it’s not something you say right after you say ,”Hi, I’m Nikki.” I never think about it until it’s time for me to pass out again. And I can tell you when i’m going pass out because I feel it coming on. I was tested for this in my early 20’s, but they couldn’t figure anything out. They just said it was my response to stress and pain, but it was not a seizure. Years went by and 2 years ago when I ended up in the hospital for it, it was because I had passed out at home 3 times – once every hour on the hour for 3 hours. I had never had that happen before so Boyzzz made me go to the ER. That’s when I got admitted and they started doing more tests. Again, it was determined they are not seizures or epilepsy, but Vasovagal Syncope – my response to stress and pain. They basically said if I’m too stressed out or in a lot of pain, my blood pressure drops causing me to pass out. Since I can tell when I’m going to pass out, he said there really isn’t anything they can do for it and I should just be aware of the situations that cause me to pass out and lay down when I feel the lightheadedness coming on.
So back to running and working out. Since I started taking classes at the gym 2 years ago, I would feel as if I was going to pass out during some of those classes. I mean, I would literally have to go lay down in the back of the class just to keep from passing out. When I talked to the nutritionist, she said it was because I was pushing myself too hard. Note taken. So I really have to watch myself, listen to my body, and make sure I’m fueling and hydrating properly. I had to do my homework to figure out foods that would help and i’m really forced to listen to my body now. But you don’t have to wait for something to go seriously wrong before you start listening to your body!! Today was also one of those days that if I did revert back to the old me and keep pushing myself to run farther, I would have passed out – because I was feeling the lightheartedness. This was mid-run wondering if I was really going to make it…
This is me thanking God that there was a gas station right where I parked so that I could get some water!
I had already finished my Nuun, so this was needed so that I didn’t pass out on the drive home.
And my pitiful run:
So I’ve spent the rest of the day hydrating, eating, and grocery shopping.